It was Thursday morning around 10 am. Apparently I had missed calls from my Dad and John but I had no idea because my stupid phone did not ring and had no cell service randomly that morning, just my luck...the only time my phone has ever done this. John got a text from my mom saying they couldn't get in touch with me and told him briefly what was going on. John called the girl in our apartment complex and she came over to knock on my door to wake me up. I am a light sleeper and rarely sleep till 10 am anymore but I had just worked 3, 12 hour shifts in a row and had a horrible week at work so I was exhausted. I immediately jumped up when I heard knocking at the door. I opened it and the girl said "You need to call your husband immediately, it's something to do with your brother." My first thought was he had been in a car wreck, I knew he had to go to Atlanta for his doctors appointment so I instantly thought it was something to do with him traveling back home. I ran to my phone in the bedroom and tried to call John but my phone wouldn't call out. I had to turn it off and wait for it to turn back on, longest minute of my life! I was shaking and in tears at this point. I called John and asked if my brother was ok and what was going on. He told me to call my mom that he was ok, not injured or anything but had received some bad news.
I will never forget the phone conversation with my mom. When she picked up she was crying which made me start crying as well. She managed to tell me that the MRI results about my brothers finger had not come back well, and that it showed a tumor on his finger. I was in SHOCK. My brother is 22 years old, this couldn't be happening! How was this even possible??? I couldn't comprehend the news so I kept asking her what that meant. I may be a nurse... but I can honestly admit all my knowledge about the medical field goes out the window when it comes to hearing about my family being sick, I did not want to put two and two together. I wanted to pretend that surely it was ok. Next my mom told told me this orthopedic doctor only sees 2 cases of this a year and that it is extremely rare. My mind went blank. All I could think about was my brother is 22 years old and he has so much going for him and so much life to live. Then my mom told me the news that sent me over the edge all together. My brother needed to see a specialist now and that there are only 2 specialists in all of Georgia and only 2 in Tennessee that cover these kind of cases. I was curious as to what specialist that was since there were so few of them and she then told me it was a orthopedic ONCOLOGIST. My heart hit the floor and is honestly still down there. Oncology is NO word anyone wants to hear and it has a way of shaking you down to the bone. How could my brother need to see an oncologist? Don't they understand...Chandler is a 22 year old senior in college who is the BEST brother a sister could ask for, the ideal son, the good friend, naturally smart (who is graduating with his Masters in Accounting in another year), a good Christian man, the guy all the parents want their daughters to date, a true comedian who can make his sister laugh more than anyone, a talented musician, a true athlete, and so much more. How could this be happening to my only brother?
For those of you who don't know... Chandler and I are only two years apart in age. Ever since we were little we have been the best of buddies. Whether it was fighting like cats and dogs all growing up or being the best of friends now, we have always been VERY close and he has always been my best friend. Chandler and I can pick at each other all the time, but heaven forbid someone else try to mess with the other sibling and there would be hell for them to pay. We have always had each others backs and whenever I really needed someone Chandler was right there for me, no questions asked. Chandler is one of those people who truly walks in a room and the entire room lights up. He has this contagious personality that shines and his outgoing personality that I have always been jealous of. He can literally pick me up and make me laugh when I felt like I would never been able to smile again. He is also the funniest person I know, I love being around him because he is always making me laugh the hardest I have ever laughed. He also knows exactly what to say when I'm upset, I guess that's his brotherly intuition. I could go on and on about him because I really do think he is a much better person than I am. He always had the qualities I wished I had and even though he is my little brother he is mature beyond his years and I look up to him and admire him.
So after his appointment on Thursday we immediately called out the prayer warriors for my brother. We pasted the news on to all the family and my church back home. My grandmother gets a call from a friend that goes to our church and she says she knows a woman who goes to our church that works for the head Oncologist at Emory. This is where God starts to work and things start to fall into place. My grandmother calls this woman up and tells her about my brothers situation. Twenty minutes later the head doctor of oncology at Emory in Atlanta is calling my Dad to talk to him about my brother, who ironically also goes to my church back home. This is before my brother even decided where he was going to try to be seen, it Atlanta or in Nashville. The head doctor of oncology said he could get in touch with the two doctors who are the specialist in Georgia who happen to be at Emory. We couldn't have made any of this fall into place any better. My brother gets an appointment the next day, Friday, at 8 15 am with the orthopedic oncologist. This would have been IMPOSSIBLE without these connections and God at work!
After his appointment on Friday, Chandler is scheduled to have the tumor removed from his finger on Nov. 1st. From there they will replace the bone they take from him with a cadaver bone and then send the tumor off to be biopsied. We will know the results in a week from Nov. 1st. The tumor is either benign or malignant. We are praying that everything will be benign and there will be No signs of cancer. But all we can do is pray and put our trust in God. Waiting has been torture and it's only been 4 days since all the news. We are still in shock and still can't wrap our minds around everything. This all began 3 years ago when my brother's finger became swollen on one hand and painful occasionally. We thought for a long time that it would go away and was probably an injury from when he played basketball in high school. When it didn't go away he finally saw a doctor a year ago who told him it was just a bone sheath that had grown and just needed to be removed. Well before surgery my brother wanted a second opinion and thank God he did. The next doctor did a x-ray which didn't show anything so the next step was the MRI which showed the tumor. NEVER in our wildest dreams did we think it could be anything like this.
I know that everything happens for a reason and God doesn't give us anything that we can't handle in life. All I know is that I am frustrated and confused as to why this is happening to my brother. I really wish I could take it all away for him and that it could be me instead. There are no words to describe how I feel all I know is that I have cried a ton, been angry, confused, mad, sad, hopeful, restless, lost my appetite, and discouraged. All I know is that Chandler is stronger than I am and I'm scared to death for him. You never know when your whole world will randomly be turned upside down. All you can do is love the ones around you with everything you have all the time, never take anyone in your life for granted, pray for them constantly, if you have a disagreement be quick to forgive, call them up or see them regularly, and never forget to tell them how proud you are of them and how much they mean to you. It really is the simple things in life like family that mean the most.
It's also times like these were we realize how blessed we are. My brother and family has had SO many people reach out to us and support us during this difficult time. All the prayers, phone calls, face book messages, e-mails, and visits has meant the world to us and truly makes all the difference. We know that prayer is the most powerful medicine and my brother has people all over the country praying for him. Please continue to keep Chandler in your prayers, he is still struggling with the news as well as my family. I will continue to update as we know more but thank you for all the thoughts and prayers. I have no doubts that my brother will fight this like a pro. Also, thanks for allowing me to be real and honest with my feelings. Even though this was very difficult to write it helps me get out my fears and sadness which I needed to work through. Just remember Chandler... God and your sister have your back and are here with you every step of the way!
- A heavy heart
Praying for some good news in the coming weeks! That post brought tears to my eyes. I cannot say I know what you are going through but I am here for you if you need me and the whole Alfano family is praying for yall!!!
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